Deep breath

I wish I knew what to say. Hello there? Pleased to meet you? Hiya, perhaps? I’ll just get on with it:

For ten years, I was different people.

At first – not at my first, naturally, but at first when I’d started in as the different people – I was Adri. 2006 to 2010. Adri was reckless. Probably amoral. A hyper-sexual ginger who’d get in and out of troubles with her old friend, Harry.

But even in those days, I was not a reckless, probably amoral, hyper-sexual ginger.

Next I was Katy. 2011-2015. Of Katy, I will now list a few characteristics, just as I did with Adri. Katy was an intermittently homeless lesbian. What else? She was unfortunate, even to an extreme degree, I suppose. A co-worker, Harry, helped her to even the score at times.

If there was a score.

Either way, I was not an unfortunate, intermittently homeless lesbian.

Finally, I was Nasreen. This was in 2016, mostly. Nasreen was a pretty American Muslim who talked of little things and loved her family most of all. A man named Harry got mixed up in all of it somehow, as tended to happen with the people I was.

But I was not a pretty American Muslim who talked of little things and loved my family most of all. I was Harry.

I’m Harry.

This is the story of my rise and fall.

Comments

  1. You know, this only seems to further the evidence that every pretty girl on the Internet is actually just a man.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think he might be onto something.

      Delete
    2. Well played. Both you and SR, I mean.

      I only recently discovered that the reason my attempts to hit on 20-year old pop star girls online hasn't been working might be that I'm actually communicating with 30-something social media guys.

      Obviously, I was shocked by this, and Adri, Nasreen, Katy, and I all felt a little deceived.

      Delete
    3. Yeah, how come I never meet these lovely women in real life?

      Delete
    4. Having a writing habit - especially one like yours - requires choices. You can't prioritize everything.

      Delete
    5. So all kidding aside, we've always been here because we love the writing and the storytelling, and how you blur the lines between what's true and what's not. We weren't around for the whole Adri thing, and I believe we started blogging at about the same time Katy did, so we did think she was real, even if we didn't think the stories were. I always thought of them, personally, as Katy kind of daydreaming out loud, as a way of making her life seem much more exciting than it really was, what with her being a homebody who had a fairly mundane job. But I didn't actually question if she was real. I mean, at her core, she was a previously homeless lesbian who was very unlucky in dating. I would imagine most people trying to be someone else on the Internet would want to look more... glamorous than that, I suppose.

      Like Fang, I'm really hoping to hear how you pulled this off with pictures and videos. Hell, especially videos, since I know that some videos (even recently) have been uploaded of Katy.

      I mean, it's not like you're uploading pictures like this and saying, "Wow, that salad I ate today sure was hilarious!" - Love, Katy

      http://static9.depositphotos.com/1491329/1110/i/950/depositphotos_11104408-stock-photo-diet-beautiful-young-woman-eating.jpg

      So color me impressed and intrigued.

      Delete
    6. You thought Katy was a plain little person with a boring life. Just imagine how a person who was pretending to be her must be!

      On the upside, you were the first person to comment on this blog. Had the comment been less positive, the blog might have immediately disappeared. You are therefore responsible for anything that happens from here.

      Ripples!

      Delete
  2. Replies
    1. Thank you, Lloyd. I've been unsure about this decision and you have made me feel more confident about it.

      Now I just have to see whether I can write when I'm not in character.

      Delete
  3. I've always thought there were multiple personalities at play. It looks like you guys have come together. Cool... I'll alert the media.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I sort of feel as though I just shot holes in the bottom of a couple very nice boats.

      Buyt I suppose it's like quitting heroin: In the short term, you've got no heroin. But in the long term, it's probably the best thing for you.

      Not "you". I don't mean that you ever took heroin.

      The real me is alienating long-term contacts already...

      Delete
  4. Craze i always thoughtthis way still i worship ur writing and character.whoever u r i like u without demands.i wish u successin ur new endeavour

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, Arun. It is wonderful to see you. This place is still pretty bare bones. I might need your assistance prettying it up a bit.

      Delete
    2. Disqus - is so much better than blogger comments - Disqus allows images and some html

      Delete
    3. One good thing about blogger is that the comments remain even if the commenter quits. With disqus, they disappear.

      But I have not made my final decision yet...

      Delete
  5. One of my favorite writers no matter who you channel. ❤️

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for that, psychochef. This is probably where I'm going to be for the foreseeable future.

      Unless no one reads it, in which case, I'm fine with regenerating into a sexy Russian spy / international supermodel.

      Delete
  6. You know, this doesn't come as a surprise to me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, Bill. Yeah, well, you made the jump from blog to blog to blog over the years. You, Cal, Allen (GOODSTUFF), and Lloyd. I'm trusting that one of you will let me know if I need to go and start writing in character again.

      Delete
    2. High Harry Dude !

      There are internet rumors... That your are a social media spy for The Donald

      BTW - Adding you to my blogroll

      Delete
    3. Thanks, Allen! It's pretty bare bones around here right now, but you know how it goes with me: Things start plain and it turns into a circus quickly.

      Delete
    4. See, you're my friend and I don't really give a damn what character you choose to write in. Personally I found Naz the reallest - that's a word as of now - of your creations. Especially the family (whose pictures did you use?). But I think I do want to get to know Harry.

      Delete
    5. Thanks. I thought Naz worked best as a real person, too.

      Adri, of course, was my super hero. She was a force of nature and the perfect secret identity.

      Delete
  7. Somehow you don't seem very hairy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I guess I'll have to be adding the hair as we go along. Perhaps like that episode of Beavis and Butthead where they tape hair to their faces to make themselves appear more manly.

      Delete
    2. You could just braid your hair under your nose and pretend its' muttonchop whiskers. That look was apparently popular in Austrailia where I saw a number of Sikh men sporting something similar.

      Delete
    3. Hey, muttonchops worked for some of our finest late 19th century Presidents!

      Delete
  8. Replies
    1. Haha. Actually, that sort of pic is one of the reasons this change of blogs seems like such a good idea.

      People are even more strange than I expected: "I really enjoyed reading that blog post. I am going to email her some intimate pictures to say thanks!"

      Delete
    2. Ha. And insofar as a couple of the perpetrators were people we both know, I'll leave it at that.

      Delete
  9. Replies
    1. I appreciate it more than you know.

      I'm going to keep writing and keep talking to whomever responds, and I'll just deal with the fallout.

      It's the right thing to do since I'm dealing with real people with real feelings, regardless.

      Delete
  10. Man, what the hell, I am so confused. Nasreen wrote about Harry though, as I recall. Am I witnessing a writing experiment unfold?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't blame you for being confused. I am an enormous jerk, I suppose.

      You're seeing a writing experiment end.

      The question for me is, will I still be able to write without it?

      Delete
  11. Still, you posted some great writing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! It is my hope I will continue to do so.

      Delete
  12. Also I'm curious, Nasreen had plenty of pictures. How did you come about those? Was someone assisting you in your impersonations? I didn't follow Nasreen on social media, but what about social media presence? Were you living a single (fictional) personality online? Not to mention, *why*?
    This is fascinating!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is completely unfair to drag this out but I am going to drag it out a bit in future posts. It's been a big deal for me and I'd like to tell it the right way.

      Delete
    2. Perfectly reasonable. I can't wait to read all about it, but for now, bravo for conning hundreds of people over the past ten years. Impressive!

      Delete
  13. I was sucked in completely. Were you a double naught spy in your former life? Is there dissociative identity disorder going on or are you just amazingly gifted? All the pictures really added to the tales. Whoever you are I am thoroughly impressed and probably not worthy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. I'm not sure I can do this thing I do if it's not in a character. But I'm going to try. I'm not sure exactly what form this is going to take...

      Delete
  14. All I'll say now is that Nasreen did seem kind of young to know about some of the music she wrote about.

    -Doug in Oakland

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Music is sort of my Achilles heel. A 24-year old conservative Muslim would probably not know much about the side projects of the members of King Crimson.

      Speaking of King Crimson, I hope that Robert Fripp is taking good care of Adrian Belew right now, because two of the four lead singers the band ever had have died in the past couple months...

      Delete
  15. Ah, come on. Please drop the cryptic drag-it-out double-speak. I have enjoyed the writing of each incarnation. If it all turned out to be not autobiographical, okay, let us know, but the use of the pictures of "you/Katy" plus video, would make this "revelation" extra creepy. If you're now adopting a new persona to distance yourself from your last blog, that's a bummer, but makes way more sense.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't mean to be cryptic, although that is part of the way I blog, I suppose, Mr. Pickle.

      The last blog got cut off at the knees, and my first instinct was to run back to Katy. Then I considered running back to Adri.

      Finally, I thought long and hard about it and thought perhaps I should just try being myself. I don't know whether I can pull it off, but there are advantages. I'm going to give it a try.

      Delete
  16. Wow I thought me coming out as a Transman was brave. Good luck with being you, it's the best way to be.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm not sure the two things are comparable, as I can always able to simply log off the computer and any difficulties I face go away.

      Still, the honesty thing is probably a good policy, within the bounds of my sometimes fictional ideas.

      Delete
  17. I first stumbled on Katy on Liberally Lean from the Land of Dairy Queen. Her comments there led me to a strange world that made me laugh and cry found on Fascist Dyke Motors. It was obvious that this was a fictional version of her life but the search of looking through the shadows to try to see what was real made me care about her. When she disappeared I was worried. I imagined her at rock bottom of depression and chemical abuse. I prayed for her safety. When she stated she was coming back I was overjoyed. When it was a link to this blog it was like the death of a friend. Harry you are a great writer. I have posted quotes by Katy on my Facebook on several occasions because of the beauty of the words. The first was about tornadoes in Oklahoma. I will continue to read and look forward to finding out more about you. We are all only as sick as our secrets.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is probably the best comment I've ever gotten. Thank you, Bryan.

      It's probably going to take me a few weeks to find my sea legs here, but I'm hopeful that I can.

      Delete
  18. Replies
    1. Hi, Megaly. You have no idea how much each hi means to me just now.

      Delete
    2. I am very glad. I am also happy to know that you didn't go poof. :-)

      Delete
  19. And I sent people to read the wonderful whimsical tales of Naz! wow...well I'm glad you're explaining this because I was concerned when you/she went private for a while, in this time of raging Islamophobia I was guessing that someone had gone after her/you online.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is something I hope to go into more in future posts, but over these past couple of years, I was able to see how strangers act towards people who are different. I was Katy during the years when gay marriage and, well, wedding cakes were on the news every day. I was Nasreen during a year when Muslims in America were making the news.

      For the record, at least online, I have to say that Muslims face way worse treatment than gay people.

      Delete
    2. I will be very interested to read about those experiences. Looking forward to it!

      Delete
  20. I kinda miss Katy in the comments .

    I knew Katy and Nasreen were the same person never took it any farther .

    Glenn

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If this whole truth thing doesn't work out for me, there might be another cute young Houstonian with an attitude roaming the blogosphere someday.

      Delete
  21. On one level I have to admit that I am unhappy with you, because I fell for Nasreen hook line & sinker, and when her FB page disappeared and her blog went invitation-only in this time of rampant Islamophobia, I feared that she'd attracted some of the bullies who are having such a field day these days.

    On the other hand - most astonishing plot twist to date from a writer whose twistiness with plots I was already thoroughly enjoying!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha... I hope I have entertained more than I have deceived.

      Delete
  22. How's the sleep paralysis? I hope it is better!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi again! I've been drinkinga bit at night again which, contrary to what I'm told is supposed to happen, tends to keep all of sleep issues at bay. So things are pretty good.

      Delete
  23. Hi Harry! I'm glad I found this blog!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, Stacy! I am going to have to go back around and round everybody else up from the old blog soon. I'm glad you found me!

      Delete
  24. I should like to follow this blog, please. Previously, I followed Nasreen on G+, and read her blog as often as I saw a new post. I'm intrigued, and don't wish to miss out anymore! :-) I'm glad I was able to reach this place.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is just starting. I'll be starting a G+ for this new account. Right now, most of my traffic is coming from Katy's old facebook and G+.

      It's going to take time.

      Delete
  25. Wait. I like the pretty Muslim girl. She went well with my other Muslim friends.

    Oh well. Hi Harry!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, and I LOVE writing as a created character. There's a lot of freedom in it, and I might do it again.

      But for the sake of my own sanity, I'm going to try things this way for a while.

      Delete
  26. Nice to finally reconnect. Baddog.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Well, Ol' Red as usual is about the last person to figure out what's going on here. Not that he has really figured anything out yet. He will miss Katy though. She was always right nice to Red and very supportive of his more pedestrian blogging efforts. Just put him down in the confused column and not totally convinced of anything just yet. Kind of his permanent state of consciousness in these challenging days.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I understand. I've been slow to getting around on a regular basis and making nice with all of the old blogging buddies from before. In part because I don't know how everyone who doesn't know will react. Baby steps...

      Delete

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